Numb

     Days passed as I lay in bed.  The sounds of the apocalypse around didn't phase me.  Feeling like shit, everything I did was for nothing, I couldn't save anyone.  Even when I tried. The thought of wasting away in this room, surrounded by familiar objects of hers, sounded better than surviving.  Looking around I noticed the photos around her mirror, her friends and boyfriend lined the large mirror.  But one stuck out above all.  It was one year she came down to visit me and mom for Christmas.  I took her to the mall to catch up with her and we took a set of pictures in one of those photo booths.  Getting up for the first time since I curled up in my pathetic state, I grabbed the picture feeling more human the longer I stared at the strip.  Us goofing off caught forever in the thin strip of paper.  This is how she would have wanted me to remember her.  "Stop feeling bad for yourself, there will be time to mourn later.  You need to get moving, NOW!"  my other side, as I began calling the rational and sometime fearless part of me, was getting impatient with my self loathing.
     Feeling more alive than I had in the past few days, I opened the door to the living room.  The smell of decay washed over me and caused me to gag to the point of vomiting.  Holding it in I make my way to the kitchen to get something to eat before I head back into the world of the living dead.  How I managed to stay up here without attracting any of those things was beyond me.  Maybe the noise from my ride here distracted all but the one who noticed me.  Thinking about how I was going to get home from here kept my mind off of the mass of blankets in the living room, the source of the smell.  Finishing my snack of cereal bars, I pack the rest of the instant food in my bag and strap all of my equipment down.  Ready to go, my detour lasted longer than I thought.  Making my way to the door I looked back.  "I love you.  And should there be an afterlife, Ill see you there."  whispering to her remains as I wiped a single tear that rolled down, I turned for the door.  Locking it behind me, keeping her safe from anyone trying to loot later on.  "Mom would be proud, the way I took care of you."  thinking as I swept the area of any immediate threats.
                The man I had crippled upon entering the complex the other day lay right were I left him, still twitching, unable to move. Unsheathing my machete, I raided it above my head, bringing it down with all my force cleaving his head from the torso.  No longer a threat.  Strolling out into the parking lot there were very few out here, taking this advantage I dart across the parking lot.  Looking for a place to scavenge, I keep an eye out for any slouching figures in the distance.  A gas station at the end of the street catches my eye, remembering that I had left my map to Wallace and Emily.  I had hoped that they took my advice and left, not wanting to think that their involvement in getting me here could have gotten them killed.  Creeping through the destroyed window, I check the racks for a road map.  Finding what I need I open my bag and place it in, opting to dump all the snack food I could fit in there as well.  Might as well, nobody else is going to eat it I thought as I dumped as much as I could without splitting the seams.  Looking around for anything else I could need or want before I left I looked at the registers.  Money was useless here and no point in.... "Hello cigarettes!"  Whispering mockingly ad I hopped over the counter, taking a carton of my favorite brand with me.  Backpack stuffed, I leave the station.  The road signs helping me pick the right direction as I head west, a long and lonesome road ahead of me.  Looking around, I take in the sights.  This will be the last time I ever visit the small town of Beaver Creek.  One bad memory is all it took from keeping me from wanting to return.
              Several hours later, walking down the interstate, I stopped.  Frozen in fear I almost didn't make it to cover in time.  A group of people were crossing the interstate.  None of them looking as trustworthy as the last two survivors I encountered.  Peering from the trunk of a burnt husk of a car I waited.  Passing by without noticing me I wait, dusk approaching fast means I would be traveling in the dark.  Something that did not sound appealing.  Looking ahead I spot an exit ramp.  Running closer, believing my mystery guests were long gone, I examine the sign above the exit. Checking the map, this would lead past the major city that the road I was on stretched on towards.  Hiking upwards I start looking for a place that was safe enough to rest for the night.    Halfway up the ramp I turned around at the sound of gunfire.  Looking back, I see the group of heavily armed wanderers, the size of ants from here.  They were firing at a seemingly endless group of zombies coming from the town.  Their moans carrying on the wind, sent shivers down my spine.  I could hear the screams shortly afterwards, the gunshots fewer , the screams more frightened.  the undead swallowed the group like an angry grey sea.  Not my problem thinking as I looked at the vehicles on the ramp.  Finding a semi, I climb on the cab and on top of the trailer.  As the sky went from a fiery red to a cool blue, I lay facing up.  Gazing at the stars above.  I forget all the problems of the past week and just lay there.  I pull out my phone and see that there is no service.  "I was wondering when that would happen."  sighing as I put it back in my pocket.  wondering if I had hit a dead zone or if the lack of people maintaining the towers lead to a blackout nation wide.  I close my eyes, easier to sleep that it had been in a long time I slowly drift off to sleep.